Clouds dominated the skies until early evening when sun peeked through before setting. The winds were strong and cold. This weather mix was different than the past few warmer days. Just like the weather the events of the day were a mixed bag. I attended part of the first social function we've had in the past two years -- a retirement event for an admin assistant who retired after 35 years in this job. It was nice to get to chat with her and nod or wave to many folks I haven't seen since before the pandemic. I had to leave early due to an appointment that had been moved from last week. Then I checked mail for a friend who is out of town for a few days.
During a conversation today, I realized that I find myself in a liminal space again. This happens repeatedly through life -- all those times when we find ourselves transitioning from one point to an unknown other point. I'm still working on what I want to be when I grow up <grin>. What do I want to do now that I'm retired? Today I was hunting for a recipe I hadn't used for several years when I realized how much I'd like to cook new items from my rather large cookbook collection. I love cooking, but have gotten stuck in a rut particularly with the limited supplies encountered during lockdowns. I felt a flutter of excitement as I checked through half a dozen books to find the one recipe. It would be fun to cook for people and with others who love spending time in the kitchen. While some dishes will not be 'keepers' -- a friend calls these 'once-ers.' -- some will be added to the regular recipe inventory. the enjoyment is in the process and discovery. So, this is one thing I hope to do more of now. Others involve travel and some writing.
Finding some points to work towards helps reduce the anxiety of change that comes with external changes. This provides some sense of control in the midst of uncontrollable situations. Focusing on the change in self and how one navigates the uncertainties we encounter takes a lot of effort and some might even say, fortitude. Finding the positive thoughts helps tremendously. The indie pop song shared today brings some of the needed focus. I've included a version with subtitles as the singer does not always articulate well -- just her style <smile>. Keep safe. Enjoy!
Courage to Change -- Sia
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