Well -- if nothing else, today was interesting. When I use that word, I often think of the Chinese curse, "May you live in interesting times." The midterm exam that couldn't be written two weeks ago due to the campus being closed for the blizzard, had been rescheduled for today. I did the basic arithmetic to find out how many exams I needed to lay out given the numbers that were unable to write today. When laying out the exams, I put out two extra. There were still three students without papers. Luckily I had a wonderful colleague who had come to help get the room set up. She offered to make copies while I got the group started. Also, luckily no class was using that room directly after our exam, so the time it took for the 136 to hand things in and some extra time to write due to the delayed start could be accommodated. Now I had a list noting there were 135 in the class even though 136 wrote and 4 other were elsewhere. Checking the computer listing again after the exam showed that indeed there were 140 in the class. How the computer and I managed to miscommunicate is beyond me, but it did make me doubt my cognitive abilities more than once today.
Mistakes happen and may be caused by more than one person or thing. I'll apologize to them all in class on Thursday and take responsibility for my part in this and will continue my love-hate relationship with the electronic way of managing life. Mistakes can bring out positives -- and on reflection, I realized that I tended to panic when there were more students than papers. There were several ways to work through this one that could have worked had I been there on my own. I needed to move into problem solving mode more quickly and out of the what happened and what did I do wrong thinking and muttering place. <smile>. Again, I am so thankful to have had a colleague and friend with me when this error occurred -- regardless of where the blame may lie.
My thoughts of brain malfunction today brought several lyric lines to mind from an older song. They ask several of the questions I've asked myself. The female singer was one with an amazing voice and style. Enjoy!
Today brought a definite change of pace. I was up late with the Oscars, but left long before the drama there really began. When the alarm went off at 6 AM I was in a sound sleep and was sure something had happened to make the alarm go off in the middle of the night. So began the first day back to the manic work schedule after Reading Week. Classes went well with most students back, but several stuck due to flight delays and cancellations or illnesses. I managed to get many things completed for deadlines tomorrow, but still have a couple of key items that need attention smartly tomorrow.
Even going back to work after a long weekend can take some adjustment, but after a week away, with the workplace work done during the week, can be long enough to readjust to a schedule that works well for the individual. The work schedule in the office is a totally different creature. The faster pace with demands coming from all directions creates a very different schedule. On a good day, the frenetic periods are interspersed with brief pauses that allow one to catch one's breath and be ready for the next sprint. Other days are at high octane level from start to finish and even beyond into one's dreams.
When pondering a song for today, I wanted one that illustrated the change of pace that the return to classes brings along with the ramped-up pace that will be needed to finish the term in 6 weeks after missing the better part of a full week with snow days before Reading week. Several songs came to mind. I got down to two and then chose one. The song is mainly fast paced but with some slower tempo changes and complex rhythms. The lyrics bring the drama that can find its way into an overfull workday. I found the fast pace to be somewhat frantic which fit parts of the day. There were moments to breathe between, though. The title also indicates how my morning started with the abrupt waking and running around. Enjoy!
Bat out of Hell -- Meat loaf
(I would also suggest Paradise by the Dashboard Light which has many tempo changes and lots of drama -- rather like an operatic piece -- that fit today well, too)
It poured rain last night with some snow leaving, but still huge piles everywhere. The fog just over the snow pack was breathtaking last night -- warm air meeting cold. Today I caught up on some correspondence and prepared questions for my meetings tomorrow afternoon. The last of the laundry was completed and a supper worthy of being called a Sunday dinner was prepared along with other items to store in the freezer for those late homecomings after the upcoming work days. After packing lunch for tomorrow, I settled in to watch the hoopla around the Oscars. I don't always watch, but for some reason this year I'll watch -- at least for a while. I poured a glass of an old vine Zin and sat with the TV and the laptop for a small celebration of the end of this first half of term and the beginning of the next half tomorrow.
The song to share today opened the Oscars. It does have an upbeat feel and has lines that fit me and my thinking today. The singer was in a boy band years ago and has a solid solo career. So -- I'm off to find my gold sequined dress and settle in here. Enjoy!
I spent this sunny day working on the online course I'm doing in my spare time (insert your spit take here). It is about food and culture from a Folklore standpoint. I'm enjoying this but have yet to get to the live stream weekly course -- maybe this week -- but the archive is there for people like me. I'm trying not to be 'one of those students' when I find myself sending messages to the professor -- I'm not sure I'm fully meeting that goal <smile>.
It was nice to spend much of the day catching up on the three weeks that I'd missed today. I did laundry and household chores, but my focus today was the course. It has been a while since I've had a day to focus on 'me' things, so this was fun, though 3 weeks of work was a challenge and took me well into the late evening. Hence, no post made yesterday.
The song I chose to share today is one that came to mind when thinking about classes and school from the student side. The video with this has some amazing outfits -- it was a crazy style time in history for certain <smile>. Enjoy!
The sun shone strongly again this morning and into the afternoon. Temperatures climbed well into late spring areas - mid-to high teens. We still have snow piles that would be measured in metres, but much water is collecting on the ground so snow is melting. Rain is expected overnight into tomorrow -- about 15 mm. I expect ice next week. When I opened the inside front door this morning, the furry one ran to look out the storm door, which is his favourite place to be in summer temperatures. So, even though the world outside his usual window is still very white, he seemed to feel there was a change in the air.
I had a wonderful lunch out today with a friend I hadn't seen for some time. We had great food and conversation. I find lunch out to be extra special since my work schedule rarely allows this. Today we spent 2 hours and were the last of the lunch crew to leave the restaurant. Not needing to rush off to some meeting or other was a gift.
As the sun moved across the kitchen floor, the furry one and I sat and stood in the sunshine. I found myself singing the chorus of a song with a bit of a twist in the final line since I was on my out for lunch just after noon when the sun was almost gone from the room. I've enjoyed this song for some time. It won a Grammy in 1964 as best Folk song -- not sure how it managed to fit that genre <smile>. While the lyrics can be taken as sad by some, the melody has a happy sound to it. With my altered lyrics about heading out for lunch, the chorus found a different feel. Enjoy!
The sunshine was amazing again today and the temps increased to 8C. It felt warm, not too warm but certainly not cold, when I was outside walking around doing errands. Several tasks remain to be completed, but we'll see how tomorrow goes. Rain and rain-snow mix are expected over the next four days, so more cloud than sun seems in the offing.
The main frustration today was losing something. I do hope it is only misplaced as it meant something to me, though it wasn't of major worth in monetary terms, It still was something I was looking forward to using this coming weekend.This item could have been lost outside the house, which makes it much more difficult to determine where to call to search for it in lost and found drawers around town. There are another couple of items that I haven't been able to locate, too. For them, there is no way they are anywhere but in the house. Likely in that little somewhere that seemed to be safe and make sense when I last held them in my hands. I hope I had a safe place for the latest errant possession. Almost two weeks ago, I ran out for milk and an hour or so after returning home I was going to run outside for something. When I went to put on my favourite medium-temperature mitts, I only found one in the basket. I took the basket out of the closet and searched through it. I took the other basket of scarves out and searched through it. I used a flashlight to look for the mitt inside the dark recesses of the closet floor. Nothing. I looked on the porch since I often take off the mitt to unlock the door. Still nothing. I called the store where I'd gotten the milk. No mitt there either. Then an hour or so later, after much fretting, I thought perhaps it could be in the back of the closet between the chimney brick and the wall. With the aid of the trusty flashlight, I looked way in the back and almost up at the ceiling level, there it was sticking to the roughness of the brick. Now I didn't actually put it there, but when I threw my mitts up into the basket, one mitt went walkabout -- or perhaps that is flyabout. I'm hoping the other three items are somewhere in the house but maybe not somewhere quite as obscure.
Searching found me a wonderful little song that fits this whole losing things mess. It is humorous, though in the moment I'll admit to feeling quite sad about the latest misplaced item. The song did make me smile, though. Enjoy!
Oh, No! I'm Looking for my Glasses Again -- Four Bitchin' Babes
It felt very cold in the pre-dawn hours this morning. Overnight, temperatures dropped considerably from close to freezing to -10C at 8 AM. Wild. By noon it was 4C, so the bright sun did its job. Seeing the cat soaking up the sun in the kitchen this morning was wonderful. His undercoat of golden fur becomes the major colour with the dark taking a back seat. Such a pretty little guy. It is to be warmer tomorrow, but still only single digits above freezing.
I'm still surprised when I see locals (generally university student aged) who insist on wearing t-shirts, shorts and flip-flops on sunny days. Some even quizzically complain that it is cold while the sun is shining. A quick review of low vs. high pressure systems seems totally lost on them. We still have shoulder deep piles of snow, so their feet must freeze on such days. It doesn't mean summer is here -- it is just a wonderful sunny winter day. I do find it odd that seemingly intelligent folks don't seem able to grasp the fact that checking the weather would let them know it is still cold (there's an app for this <gg>). I've had to inform them of oncoming snow storms recently, too. It also makes me wonder if the quintessential Canadian conversation topic of weather will be lost with the next generations.
When I stood with my feet in a sunbeam this morning, I could feel the warmth -- solar loading beginning to be greater as we move into the end of winter. Of course, this brought a song lyric to mind <smile>. This was written in the wee hours of November 22/63. just hours before the Kennedy assassination. So, the meaning of the lyrics changed for the singer/songwriters. It is a melancholy tune, but it notes the wonders of the warm sun, which gives the melody a tinge of contentment. I've chosen a version with another voice singing with the original group. I like this video as it shows the personalities of group members. It begins with a review of the recording session followed by the exquisite harmonies and new lead singer. Enjoy!
Warmth of the Sun -- The Beach Boys ft. Willie Nelson
Working away on exams, quizzes and lectures today left me feeling a bit out of sorts. There is so much to cover and it would be best if it didn't confuse the listeners <smile>. Several topics can be interrelated and keeping them straight can become a challenge for students. It requires that instructors keep things clear -- a major task. The rest of the week will involve more prep work and several other projects that need to be completed in the next month. The latter requires a fair bit of focus and time, so completing this during Reading Week is paramount.
As I've been working through the files and piles, at times it has felt like it would all keep rising like floodwaters. Balancing on a narrow bridge over the torrents adds stress to the day. Interestingly while checking social media today, I discovered that a song that fits this metaphor has historical roots in this date. On Feb 21, 1970 this song hit #1 on the UK charts. The song remained on various charts for some time -- over 300 weeks -- that's almost 6 years! It was at #1 8 times for a total of 41 weeks. I've loved the melody and lyrics since I first heard it. The keyboard work is spectacular. Enjoy!
Today involved hiding myself away to work on exam grading and lecture preparation. It was grey outside with some flakes in the air at times, but nothing too much staying on the ground. There is to be a bit of freezing rain tonight, but not enough to make much difference, either. I hope to continue the grading of the last of the exam and then work on some of the items on the long long list for Reading Week, many with deadlines of early next week.
Listening to the wind outside seems strange, since it sounds like a storm yet none was in the offing according to forecasters. I haven't seen anyone or spoken to anyone today. It feels like I'm trying to cloister myself to get the work completed. Acting like a hermit for now, but have to see people tomorrow to get what is needed to finish grading. So much of the past week has been spent holed up inside the house, due to the nasty storms and work closures to facilitate snow cleanup. It can be very isolating.
I mangled a lyric to make it fit my situation today -- just to hide myself away. The melody can relax along with the wonderful vocals. The lyrics made me smile when I realized I'd altered them while working away today. Enjoy!
The day brought a lot of sun and above freezing temps. Huge icicles dropped from the back eaves. I chose to push the final snow out of the end of the driveway. It was heavy snow, but a smaller area so it seemed manageable, though it still took about an hour to finish. I'm hoping the forecast is correct and there is little snow expected in the next week. I have several errands to get to and it is easier with a car since many are not close to home but out on the outskirts of town. When not shoveling, I was grading exams -- I just want these all done so I can focus on something else.
The day brought some somber moments -- it is the birthday of a departed family member today. I was surprised by tears a couple of times. All those firsts can sneak up on you. It is part of the process but one that brings pain along with good memories. Working through the many emotions takes time and effort. Shoveling has helped with some of that this week as has music.
The song shared today has lyrics that outline the power of music. This is how I see and feel music. It flows through me -- something that can help me relax or feel the emotions that need to be felt. The group is one that has featured here before -- one with great harmonies. Enjoy!
A busy , but productive Saturday is almost over. It began with the same old activity -- shoveling snow. It was above freezing so the snow was wet and heavy and knee deep at the back and ankle deep around the front. I managed to clear the back porch and a path around the side of the house as well as the latest snow from behind the car. Still a lot by the street. More snow is expected for Monday, so I may wait and call the plow guy again to clear that all at once. Then I can get to the grocery store and do a few of the errands I hope to get to next week. Other activities involved the usual laundry and a full day on 104 exams -- just another deep pile of work to struggle through.
A song title and lyric came to mind as I worked through the snow and grading -- taken from a completely different perspective than originally intended, I expect. Enjoy!
Today was the end of a very long week. The snow fell most of the day again -- so about 40 cm (15 in) that drifted badly with the wind was followed by 15 cm (6 in) and then by about 7 cm (~ 3 in) and then the 5 cm (2 in) that fell during the day today. All of this fell on top of the few centimetres that had fallen with ice pellets and such in the other storms last week. Suffice it to say there is a lot of snow out there and more shoveling to do tomorrow. My dream is a day without the need to move snow around.
Reading Week begins next week, so no classes will happen. This will allow time to catch up on grading midterms and assignments as well as prepare lectures and activities for the final 6 weeks of the term. That should be enough time, but having missed a week (3 classes) from 2 courses and 2 classes from a third course, we will likely have to judiciously edit content to get through the key points by the end of the term. During the week, I'd like to take a couple of days to do me things. I'm not sure this plan always comes to fruition, but I am planning nonetheless. It is fun to think that there is time in the offing to do something.
The song lines that came to mind today were from a television series theme. These lyrics speak to the need to keep believing and continue the positive thinking. Enjoy!
My goodness -- the snow keeps falling in small amounts, but it has been back over and over today. Temperatures had risen so the snow that fell overnight was heavier and by the time I was home from work at day's end, it was horribly heavy and shoveling was obnoxious (to borrow a descriptor from a friend). I did only the front walkway and was very tired by that point (about an hour again) that I left the back stairs and side walkway for another day. There was to be some sun today, but the best we got was a couple hours of no snow falling. Tomorrow will be cloudy with flurries again and again and again <sigh>. The sun now is expected to appear on Saturday with above freezing temperatures. I will tackle the remaining snow then -- it will be heavy still, but it will get done. Sadly the street and sidewalk plows left a pile of detritus in the driveway. I may be able to push some of this on Saturday, as well. We'll see. If I can get some of it out of the way, the 4WD will manage the rest when I try to head out for groceries.
February generally is a month of winter storms on the east coast. They line up and travel across the continent ending on the eastern shores. Knowing this and accepting it are two very different things. I can deal with snow in small doses -- 2-4 inches/5-10 cm at a time. Even 15 cm is doable if it is colder and the snow is lighter to move. More than that is just ridiculous. I know that what I have in my front yard is about half of what some areas received this week. I find that to be of little comfort for anyone. The cold winter days tend to be sunny but crisp and cold. I like these days. They are the type of winter I grew up with, and less snow falls with the colder high pressure systems than the warmer low pressure days. I truly am ready for the groundhog to be correct and Spring to arrive in the first half of March. Sooner would not create much complaint from me, either.
The song I chose for today states how I'm feeling this week. It is much like the conversations that everyone is having this week. The fatigue that comes from spending so much time moving snow is written on the faces of people that I see everywhere. It is a tired, haggard look of defeat. This song says that to me. Enjoy! Winter has me in its Grip -- Don MacLean
While the sun didn't peak out from behind the thick clouds today, it was warmer. Much of the sidewalks and roads were slush covered and ankle deep water gathered where the storm drains hadn't been cleared. A plus of the day was that one of the three midterms planned for this week occurred as originally planned and all class members were present. I will have at least one to grade during reading week. The one rescheduled for tomorrow may or may not happen. It all depends on what the snow from the next system amounts to overnight. For the sake of all concerned, less snow would be a blessing. It is difficult not to feel under siege with the continuing storms lining up to have their kick at the can.
With the final clearing of the back porch and two exits, I have spent 3.5 hours over the past two days moving the snow. I have not cleared off the car as it was not wonderful driving today due to the snow piles taller than the car at corners and along streets. Walking was bad enough, but I felt more in control there. I will admit that tonight my back is a bit sore -- a tired, overused muscle sore. My neck feels the stress of lifting and carrying snow. Even my feet feel they've had a major workout. So, less snow would be best. Frankly, if Spring arrived in the morning I'd be one ecstatic individual <smile>.
I've chosen a song that seemed to fit the thoughts I've had today -- and those I've seen and heard from others. It deals with something different than what is happening with me, but the anxiety and anger are the same. Enjoy!
For the second day in a row the campus was closed. More scurrying to reschedule midterm exams occurred -- never a great activity since no new date will work for everyone. In the past 7 days, the university has been closed for 2.5 days due to poor weather. There have been 3 storms in those 7 days with another due to appear in 2 days -- so 4 storms in 9 days. Can you say enough already? The most recent storm left huge drifts and a goodly amount of snow. Most of the driveway (100 feet long) was upper calf level with areas that were mid-thigh and a couple areas where things were ankle deep or less. The northeast winds had blown snow from the roof on the north side of the house to make the most amazing drifts on the south side, where the sculpted snow hangs over the eaves to the tune of a foot or more. I shoveled for almost 3 hours in three different trips. I now have a path to the street. After the plow came to clear out the shoulder high piles left by the street plow at the end of the driveway, there is a gigantic bunny hill on my front lawn. The walkway, as usual, resembles a luge run. In my final trip out this evening, I moved the snow at the back of the car and stuff left by my plow guy. Tomorrow I'll do the walkway along the side of the house and clear off the back porch, stairs and clear the back basement exit. All this clearing done in time for the next storm and any on shore flurries that may arrive between now and then. The stuff is self replicating. This next storm is courtesy of a Texas low joining with an Alberta clipper to make a nor'easter. I'm ready for spring any time now. The white stuff has gotten old very quickly.
A song lyric ran through my head while moving snow around. The original is a cute song for Valentine's Day, but my lyric substituted 'shovel' for 'sugar' in the lyrics, which fit my three times outside today. Enjoy!
Thanks to the weather from Alberta and Colorado, it has been white outside my window since around noon. Winds have been strong since pre-dawn hours. The blowing snow continues and the new snow arrives as the storm circles around us. It has been like this all day. Forecasts indicate it will continue into the night and lessen somewhat during the day tomorrow, though on shore flurries will continue with the northeast winds that already have outstayed their welcome. I'll need to shovel myself out of the door and down the porch steps and wee sidewalk. I expect that is all I'll get done before I have to head into work -- unless they close for the day or have a delayed start. The midterm from today was moved to class time tomorrow. If the campus closes again, the anxiety involved will create something almost nuclear, I fear.
I tried to work on lectures for the next few weeks, though it was difficult to focus. The furry one seemed extra anxious most of the day. Any noise made him tense up. He was very tired, so likely didn't sleep too well once the wind began last night. He seems to be doing fairly well right now. I've been exhausted all day and haven't done anything to bring on that feeling. Anxiety about having to shovel out in the morning possibly adds to the weariness, as does worry over when the exam (or exams since there is another to be held tomorrow and another Thursday) will be held. By supper time I began to feel very unfocused and a bit lost. Not being able to go out to walk or move the snow almost makes me feel trapped. I just want the storm over so the cleanup can begin. I almost feel like pacing as if I were a caged animal. So glad this doesn't happen often. It is terribly uncomfortable.
The song for today is a fun one from a movie. The imagination in the lyrics goes along with the anxious feelings of today. Enjoy!
The sun was delightful today and the sky was so blue it almost made me gasp. It is hard to believe this is the calm before some gigantic storm. Thanks to a Colorado low merging with an Alberta clipper, there should be tons of snow and major winds for 36+ hours. Then a day respite before the next nor'easter forming along the Atlantic seaboard. Is it time to say 'uncle'?
I watched an older movie today -- Snow White from Disney circa 1937. It did bring some memories from childhood. However, it is one of the scary Disney fairy tales that likely gives kids some nightmares. The story is from the Grimm brothers, but has been cleaned up a bit. I did find some of the themes to be problematic. Yes, it was made in the pre-WWII era during a depression, but the source of many unrealistic expectations of girls are contained in this version. It left me with questions about women's roles in the world. How does the love at first sight between Snow and a prince whose name she doesn't know fit with life as we know it now or 80 years ago? The scene when the woodsman sends her running for her life into the woods shows there is something to fear -- darkness, woods and being alone. The character does note when she meets the woodland creatures, that she was embarrassed to have been so afraid -- perhaps showing a sliver of empowerment. When she arrives at the cottage of the seven men, she sets to cleaning the place. The men are shown working in the mines and she becomes the housekeeper -- two clear archetypes, provider and servant or nurturer. The story made me wonder why the princess always dies (or appears to die) before living in gratitude with the man who 'saves' her. Is this a metaphor for a social expectation of women needing to give up their own lives and dreams? It made me think Stepford Wives <smile>. I also wondered if the old crone might plant a seed that older single women are to be feared. I will say that thankfully, the more recent Disney and other princess movies have begun to show women working together to problem solve and survive rather than relying on some nameless prince <smile>.
Picking a song for this one was not easy. There are a few fairy tale songs that came to mind. The one shared here takes the female fairy tale character to a darker place -- one of being out of control for that is what this comes down to in my head today. Enjoy!
Saturday began sunny and ended with cloudiness. The afternoon was wonderful and bright. I shoveled the end of the driveway between laundry loads and cleaning efforts. Most of the afternoon involved baking. I made muffins -- two batches. The first batch was one my mother made often and I haven't made as much as I've thought about them. The recipe for the boiled raisin muffins came from a woman who was part of the church group Mom belonged to when I was a kid. Mine look a little different -- may have been over-mixed a bit by me this time, but they smell great. The second batch is a recipe I make regularly though it has been a few months. These oat bran muffins were a recipe from Mom that I adapted a bit -- adding a mashed banana and raisins. These ones look perfect in shape and colour. So I am now set for a while with 28 muffins.
Baking from the recipes of departed family members and friends brings memories. It is communal in nature making people feel closer to their past. This was discussed in the online course I'm doing in my spare time <smirk>. Readings were from a book I've read in the past -- Baking as Biography by Daine Tye. She wrote this authoethnography based on her mother's recipe box and cards -- linking the changes in baking style and ingredients with women's lives in church groups in the 1950s and 1960s. She wove recipes with life in an amazing way to explain the changing roles of women. Well worth the read.
I giggled when I thought of the song for today. The chorus lyrics explain much of why this blog exists. The group's original name fits the activities of today. Enjoy!
Song in my Head -- Martha and the Muffins (now M+M)
It has been a day filled with activity. Much work for the classes in the next couple of weeks was completed. I spent an hour moving snow from the storm last night. There was less snow than predicted, though what was there had a layer of frozen ice nearer the ground. The temperature was cold and fell a lot more as the day wore on. Happily, this made the snow a bit lighter. I still have about 30-40 minutes to clear out the last 2 car lengths to the sidewalk. I'll do that Sunday when it is to be warmer.
I was reminded of a quote that made me think of my daily reflections in this blog. "Life can only be understood backward, but must be lived forward." This is from Kierkegaard. It fits my penchant for thinking over things from my experiences -- meant to help me understand what happened, my role in it, and what could be changed or held onto for future days. It does help a bit with understanding, but it is the change in perspective that helps the most. I maintain that we will never know the full answers to life, not in this lifetime at least. Small actions may be missed as we move through a day, but they may have larger impact in someone else's day. These things we may never understand.
A song came to mind because of the words and the video. The lyrics note an independent spirit to take charge of one's life, while the video shows that small actions can have large impacts. Enjoy!
Word of the day -- catastrophizing. This word is used in mental health to explain the thought processes that expect everything to turn out bad and not just bad, but the worst bad it could be. I encountered this in a few areas of my day -- not in my own thinking, but in the words of those around me. Midterms are happening next week for my classes and for several other courses. There have been some expressions of anxiety over this great unknown. What to study, review, and read are key questions. Study skills may not be strong for everyone when faced with the material covered in the past six weeks. Another event created major angst. An online quiz was open for 24 hours and many worked on this today when the internet connection to campus went down yet again. The silly software program submitted the unfinished quiz so the recorded grades are not what they should be. I'll have to find a way to manage a makeup quiz for several who were affected by this. The other major concern was about the way the classroom management software calculates 'grades' -- the percentages that it tries to present are never correct. The numbers for the grades are correct. Ignoring the percentages may seem difficult, but it needs to be adopted.
While these may not be huge life issues on the surface, for many they are concerns that can become overwhelmingly large when thinking gets turned sideways. We all have days or experiences that seem filled with a rising sense of panic. Today it was my turn to work to calm others rather than running around finding someone or something to calm me. Good that it wasn't a bad day for me, too -- that would have been a catastrophe <smile>.
To add to the feeling of fear that surrounds exams and quizzes, the weather was turning this afternoon. Perhaps the drop in barometric pressure is sensed unconsciously and leads to heightened anxiety. For those listening to the weather forecasts, it has been difficult to walk away without feeling panicked. The grocery store was extremely busy today when I went for my big grocery run. For many that was the 'stock up before the storm' shopping trip. The cashier said it had been steadily busy all day. While eating supper, I listened to the weather reports which made things sound dire. Granted, it is serious and people should stay off the roads and away from shorelines, but one forecaster on the television stated that Atlantic Canada was in for "48 hours of meteorological misery.' The storm is fast moving. It is not hanging around for 48 hours anywhere -- but it will take almost that long to traverse from southern Nova Scotia to northern Newfoundland. That is not uncommon. What happens here today hits NL tomorrow. After seeing the protracted snow falls in BC this past week, viewers may feel excess anxiety when they hear '48 hours' when discussing a storm track. Taken all together, it can add to the inability to breathe and re-centre.
I heard a line from a song in my head several times today. It did make me smile and try to approach things with a bit more calm than usual. The lyrics are short phrases that go by quickly, adding to the frenetic feeling of calamity that the song brings. Enjoy!
With an abrupt phone call at 6:30 AM the day began. The emergency system from work sent a call to say we were having a delayed start -- noon -- due to the weather. I sighed and then went back to sleep for a while given this gift for an extra hour of sleep. Once awake again, I checked out the window. I'd heard heavy equipment around clearing snow, so I was surprised to find that there were only 4-6 inches down. I moved snow from the walkway to the town sidewalk and both front and back porches. I then changed and walked into campus. Rain was falling intermittently as I walked, even though it was still below freezing.
After arriving home this evening, I chose to clear the snow from the street plow and behind the car. It was still rather light until I got to the wetter bottom of the pile. I was just finishing the street end of the driveway, when a young man -- a student living just down the street -- walked by and then turned back to ask me if I wanted some assistance clearing the two car lengths behind the vehicle. Before I could fully respond, he picked up the second shovel and dug in -- literally <smile>. We had a great conversation as we both worked away at this section and it took about a third of the time it would have taken if I were doing it by myself.
Random acts of kindness can make such a difference in a day. Both my neighbour and the weather provided a sense of respite. It reminded me to continue doing the small things that might help others in their days. There are times when it is easy to become fully focused on self and not those around one. The song I thought of for today has wonderful lyrics. The band has taken a lot of negative comments, but I do love this song. Enjoy!
It is only Tuesday and it already feels like a long week behind me. I spent the day and evening, putting out little fires -- common as midterm time looms -- and preparing for a presentation. When we lost internet access on campus there were some tense moments when it wasn't clear if the internal system would let us access lecture slides and such. Happily, that did work. By the end of the afternoon, all was back to normal.
The sun shone today -- that calm before the storm that is the first of several systems headed our way. Snow will turn to freezing rain overnight and by afternoon this will be rain as the temperature climbs about 20 degrees in the next 12-18 hours. The following day will bring more overnight snow. I dislike the thought of more shoveling of a large snowfall. The smaller ones are easier to manage <smile>. We'll see what transpires and then deal with it.
A few lines from the middle of a song spoke to me today. Dealing with losses as part of life is central to the lyrics. Interestingly, the music is upbeat and fun while the lyrics could have easily become something very maudlin with a different melody. I like the hope and acceptance this choice holds. Enjoy!
Monday seems a long day with a very early classroom start, all three classes and a few student meetings. I did get through a number of key things on the list that needed to happen today, but didn't get much touched on the 'nice to do' part of that list. Maybe tomorrow. It would be nice to get these done before they become designated 'have to do'. Spent some time moving the snow from last night when I got home at supper time. It is cold -- and getting colder overnight -- so the snow wasn't too heavy until I got to the 6 feet width left by the street plow. There was a lot of heavier salted snow in that. Since more is on the way along with freezing rain and rain, I decided against clearing the full end of the driveway. I may just call the plow guy after the next couple of days of precipitation.
I spoke and typed with a few people today about issues that seem to be impeding progress -- either external or internal. For all situations, it seems that things are moving in a positive direction. It is interesting how the actions of others or our own thoughts can interfere with progress. Some end up being short-term difficulties that improve with time and patience -- the latter being very difficult when stress and frustration become involved. Longer term impediments often contain a large personal attitudinal aspect to them, which may serve to keep a person in a constant negative space. I do find myself cranking on about some thing or other, rather than trying to find a way to stop that circular thinking. Guilt, anger, hurt, frustration -- all lead to the downward spiral or at best -- the 'dog chasing its tail' circle. Learning to put events in the past, forgive self and others and look for the positives can be difficult. The goal is to develop more positive moments than negative and hopefully, more good days than not so good.
A song that speaks to the idea of moving out of the past to live in the moment is shared here today. It is a very poetic lyric. The music is a bit more complex than many of the more formulaic songs this singer often performs (and that is not a negative as I find many of those great). Enjoy!
The day has been one filled with many disparate activities. The laundry was finished, floors swept, slides for next week made, a quiz devised, a lecture listened to from the course I'm taking in my "spare" time <smile>, dinner cooked, tried to get into the secondary e-mail account (not done even with the support desk helper), and many other bits and bobs. There seemed not to be a main theme to the day. Outside the window things were different each time I checked -- cloudy, sunny, cloudy again and now snow is expected soon. So even the weather was scattered in a less than focused way.
Focus is challenging at the best of times, but when the 'to do' list has many things that seem unrelated, focus becomes almost impossible. I did manage to get things completed, but at the same time the feeling of accomplishment seems lacking. Things were crossed of the big list, but still not feeling that I did much. <smile>
I often say when my mind is scattered that I'm in a kitten mode -- distracted by any shiny thing that catches my eye. Today it was not me but the tasks at hand that were scattered. A song came to mind with lyrics that describe a type of chaos and scattered belongings -- a bit odd, but fun. Enjoy!
Mister Mistoffelees -- from CATS Original Broadway Cast
The day became colder than it has been for a few weeks. It was sunny, which helped when I was out clearing off the car this afternoon. The wind, though, made it feel so much colder. I worked at the laundry and such and cooked a new vegetable dish to take to a friends place for dinner. This was the delayed Christmas season dinner that didn't happen due to a fridge failure and an elongated time for repair. I did wear my Christmas broach and socks just to be in the celebration mood. <smile> When heading back home the temperature had dropped several more degrees and it was lightly snowing -- luckily it was a quick drive home where it is warm again.
I found an old blues song that suited my feelings about the weather today. The genre and the title say it all. The singer was known for his blues guitar. Enjoy!
The day began with amazing sunshine. It was cold outside, but the sun was delightful. I spent the day preparing for midterms which are the week after next. These need to get to printing on Monday to ensure they are ready on the requisite days. Two of the courses are in classrooms too small for empty chairs between each student -- either that or the class size is too big <smile>. So, this means making two versions of two exams. So, today, I prepared five midterm exams. Not a complaint, just what filled my day today.
I had conversations with a couple of friends during the day. These were wonderful breaks in the crazy pace of the work day. Taking a few moments to think of something different can help one to re-centre. When returning to the work, the mind is ready to focus with less clutter. There are many ways to do this. Often opportunities just arise. The trick becomes ensuring we take those moments for our own good and that of the task at hand. The overall goal is to not get lost in the swirling details and demands. Take the time to just be yourself. Another goal to add to my daily 'to do' list <grin>.
The song selection is one new to me but the lyrics fit some of the meanderings of the blog today. Enjoy!
Another long day nears its close. Thursdays have three lectures and several meetings making them rather full days. Today we were back to fighting with a software system and supports. It will all work well, but nonetheless was frustrating when in the midst of it all. In hind sight, I can smile a bit at the absurdity of it all <smile>.
Today as often happens, friends pulled together to help each other through the difficulties. Sometimes this involves lending an ear to one as they vent or struggle with the world around them. Other times advice may be requested or encouragement needed to keep moving forward and not just chuck it all and walk away. Humans are social beings, even though that can be hard at times. Without each other, we'd not accomplish half of what we do with others involved. Friends recognize that we need some time alone or without chatter --just that little break to re-centre. Friends know when we need a smile or a laugh or a hug. As Facebook noted today, "Friends make you, you." I'd add that friends make me a better me.
I've been blessed with wonderful friends, many of whom I consider family. A favourite song of mine came to mind when reflecting on the day's events. There are many versions, but I always hear one particular interpretation of the lyrics and music. I'll share one of the many recordings made of this song by this artist. He truly made it his own -- a soulful, thoughtful rendition rather than the lighter, bouncier one done by others. Enjoy!
It has been a reasonable day, yet not without its mountains. Two classes went smoothly -- good engagement in group work for both. The afternoon brought a meeting to discuss possibilities for a plan I've been thinking of for some time. I've had trouble getting things to fall into place, so had someone else look at arrangements to see what they could glue together. It seems that it may not be possible to do what I had dearly hoped to do quite as I'd originally planned. There may be one other option that I'll look into tomorrow. Like the Stones once said, 'You can't always get what you want." <smile>
Pulling in assistance for this project helped me to see things from another angle. That was useful. I'd been feeling a bit defeated and blamed myself. Like I've told others often, asking for help is not a sign of weakness -- it is an admission that we are human and need other perspectives for clarity. There are many small decisions and larger projects that need attention, but I've felt somewhat paralyzed and on my own -- almost abandoned. Gathering input form others does help in dealing with difficulties encountered.
A song I hadn't heard for a long time entered my consciousness at some point today. One line seemed perfect for the day's events -- "so you let time forgive the past and go and make some other plans." The lyrics contain a spark of hope amidst the almost sad melody -- an emotional mix that feels vaguely familiar. Enjoy!
Tuesday seemed slightly better than Monday. I had a bit more sleep, but still felt very weary through the day. Lectures worked better with the extra sleep. I found it more difficult yesterday with 4 hours of sleep that included 5 wake ups. The universe was trying to be ironic Monday, too, since the 8:15 lecture dealt with the impact of sleep disruption in aging adults. <sigh> The plans I've been working on seem to be overly convoluted, so I enlisted outside assistance. We'll continue that planning process tomorrow to check feasibility. My late work day ended with a meeting that I chaired. It went well with many comments and questions -- always good to see that engagement.
Decision making can be challenging, particularly when there seems to be an endless parade of hefty ones clamoring for attention and draining every last gram energy from within. Ignoring the situations can feel freeing briefly. Yet, even when being ignored, they hang over your shoulder just out of sight waiting to blindside you. When feeling exhausted is becomes so much more difficult to deal with the day to day stuff that needs to be done.
A song that seemed to fit the feeling for the mid-part of the day -- all that decision stuff -- is shared tonight. The singer/songwriter has spoken about the lyrics, noting that they are about the feeling during a personal struggle. They emphasize the need to breathe, something I've been reminded to do recently by a couple of friends. <smile> Enjoy!
Note: The video is not the best here, but the audio is good.
