Day 7 - 89 -- Trusting

Laundry, sweeping and dusting all fit into this 13th day of self isolating. I tackled cinnamon rolls, but due to the shortage of flour, I couldn't make the yeast-raised type I'd planned. Instead I used my mom's biscuit recipe as the bread base. These turned out reasonably, though could be far more cinnamon for my taste. They were crisp on the outside and fluffy on the inside. Yum! Sadly as they all can't -- well, shouldn't -- be eaten all at once, the exterior crispness will be lost by tomorrow. <sigh> Flavour will still be good, though. In the afternoon, I headed out for a walk in the bright sunshine. It was only about 2C, so was cool even with the warmth of the sun. Walking with tunes seems to settle some of the anxiety that if lurking just below the surface for us all these days.

While reading social media posts from friends, one stopped me in my tracks. In a post about being aware of the mental health issues that come with being isolated, a friend made a statement that has had me thinking ever since. She said, "If you don't have people you can trust with all of you -- consider community-based help." It was the first part of that sentence that made me hold my breath. I am so very lucky. Very lucky. As an introvert I have a small circle of close friends. Each of these knows parts of me, but far fewer of a small list are trusted with anything and everything. I know when I speak to these  people, it all goes to a place of no judgement. Often, I will be doing the long preface into my main concern or question and these folks get there before me and provide reassurance. At other times, they talk me through anxiety -- walking with me to a place where I can breathe again. I've said this already, but it bears repeating -- I am so very lucky to have such people in my life and to be in daily contact via phone or internet --well, it brought me to tears. I laughed while walking when it reminded me of Christina Yang noting that  Meredith Grey was her 'person'.  To have one is amazing, but to have two or three is exceptional.

It is normal to feel things more acutely now in this stressful time with that undercurrent of anxiety, that layers on over all our hot buttons making them far more sensitive. Lyrics of a song used in the blog in the past came to mind while walking. They mention fear and doubt along with struggling with belief that things will improve. And the video begins with a train <smile>. Take care of you. Find trust in you and in others. Enjoy!

River of Dreams -- Billy Joel