Day 222 -- a visit from apathy and inertia

Well -- this was one of those days described best by apathy or inertia. Granted, there is some rain outside today, but I'm not convinced that has anything to do with the lack of 'get up and go.'  I did complete a couple household tasks and a few things for work and volunteer projects. Yet, the bigger items I'd thought of tackling were put back in the briefcase for another day.

This approach to 'work' today led me to reflect on the bigger picture. The vague feeling of being trapped and not being able to find the way out -- the same route one took to get in -- is a recurring dream theme. This is often related to anxiety when things begin to pile up and the sheer enormity of tasks becomes overwhelming. I've found that I tend to do the things required for my job and volunteer roles -- the things that others depend on me to do, but, I seem to push some of the more intense things that need to be done for me into a closet with a closed door. If I can't see it, it isn't there (I learned that from my cat friends <smile>). Yet, these items do need to be addressed eventually. One must  do more than simply exist. As Kofi Annan has said, "to live is to choose."

Only one song carries the breadth of feeling that my reflections uncovered. It mentions 'voices calling from far away wake you up in the middle of the night" -- those looming tasks and buried thoughts that we all must confront. The lyrics clearly speak to the anxieties of being unable to get out of something that we've gotten ourselves into -- some type of situation or thought process that presents difficulties for extrication. It does some philosophical things well albeit more existential than suits my comfort level. However, the 12-string in this unplugged version is amazing <smile>.  Enjoy!

Hotel California -- The Eagles