Day 2-93 -- Forgiveness

It's been a day of reflection. Though some grading and housework was done, my brain wondered off several times -- into a place filled with questions. Why do we seem to inflict pain on others with words and actions? Why is forgiveness a rare commodity? There are many events buried deep inside that still create pain and anger, so why can't I move beyond such things? We never understand exactly what provokes someone to be mean, and we likely don't fully grasp when we are being less than kind. It seems people often become wound up in themselves and lash out at others -- the 'all about me' syndrome.  We all have our moments, but may need to learn to be more mindful of our effect on the world. We also need to learn to forgive ourselves.

Forgiveness involves giving someone the benefit of a doubt as well as another chance. When inappropriate behaviours are repeated over and over, how do we let someone know this without causing them pain? I'm not convinced that 'letting it go' is always the right way to respond. Should a person be made aware of the pain they inflict? For some relationships, this is a necessity and should be easier to address (though this isn't always the case if historically problems have been ignored). Other personal links are more superficial or casual and may not lend themselves to a frank discussion. These situations may initiate the 'just walk away' approach if one can extricate oneself from that connection in the future. Again, not always possible. Advice I've often given is to be kind to each other. This might minimize the need to ask for and provide forgiveness.

When forgiveness presents itself, there is a release of sorts. A strained relationship becomes comfortable again. The song for today is one that understands this concept. I've felt the lyrics speak to both the one providing forgiveness and the one needing to be forgiven, even when they are the same person. The singer interprets the lyrics and music in a manner that presents the feelings well. Enjoy!

Sweet Forgiveness -- Bonnie Raitt