Day 2 - 151 -- (Lack of) Television Content

It was a rainy Sunday today with a massive temperature drop during the afternoon -- just more of that maritime weather for you. I'd thought of cutting down a few volunteer ferns today with the hand pruners, but it just got too wet. So -- I spent time indoors sending messages for a volunteer project and a research project.  Most of the time I'd planned to rest in front of the TV, yet found it difficult to find something worthwhile to watch.

It has been strange that as the number of channels available has constantly increased, the unique content and content of substance has declined. It appears that with the expansion of the number of channels held by any one media outlet, the same amount of content -- and often identical re-run content -- has been distributed across multiple channels, spreading content so thinly that it barely seems worth the effort. Perhaps it is akin to the expansion of professional sports leagues, which served only to ensure that more games were played leaving owners wealthier and fans paying hiked prices to watch. It seems that sports leagues and cable companies choose to defy the law of supply and demand -- as supply increases generally people are willing to pay less per unit cost due to the glut of available product. So why does their revised model of high cost for more of the same product continue? Marketing plays a role -- they tell us the service delivery is costly and the product is valuable -- and we buy it -- literally and figuratively.  After a full Sunday of nothing worth watching on live TV or on-demand or dvr, I really question why cable is so expensive -- hundreds of channels and nothing that would keep my attention to be found.

A couple of songs came  to mind for today's selection. I chose one that clearly notes the frustration I felt today. The relentless back beat adds to the tedium and lack of unique programming one can find on the screen. Enjoy1

57 Channels (and nothin' on) -- Bruce Springsteen

Day 2 - 150 -- Solo Flight

Today was interesting.  I tried a new household chore and successfully completed a change of bedding with one arm.  Sounds small, but while  it took a goodly long time to do, it felt like a major life hurdle was breached. <smile>  I slept a lot today and the pain ramped up while sleeping. Thus when I woke there was a lot of grumpiness. Eating and taking the meds seemed to even things out well.

Feeling perky once again, I got dressed and headed out for my first solo walk-about. There was some anxiousness, as I headed out to get milk and a couple small grocery items from the drug store a couple blocks from the house. I  needn't have worried. Halfway to my destination I stopped to say hello to a friend. As we were talking two others arrived and once I entered the parking lot I encountered two more acquaintances. This is one of the joys of a small town -- one is rarely ever 'solo'. <smile>  This reminded me of all the friends and family who live some distance away, yet I know they are sending healing thoughts across the miles -- so, again, not solo. Thinking of those close and far while putting good thoughts into the universe for all concerned, should help me to deal with grumpiness and fear that come with any disruption to the daily routine of life.

The selection for today is a Disney song that reminds me of the fact that one is never truly alone when one has friends. I chose a version by an artist with just the right voice for this song. It could almost be a lullaby at the end of this day of more firsts <smile>. Enjoy!

Somewhere out There -- Micky Dolenz

Day 2 - 149 -- Small but Mighty

It has been a quiet Friday. Lots of time spent doing work and volunteer e-mail. and the rest of the day doing the basic activities of daily living. All things take longer to do and require more energy. I worked my best to listen to the cues and go with the flow.  The weather cooled today and is to be much cooler overnight. This will help to make the weekend more pleasant to be indoors.

I know I've mentioned that dreaded 'to do' list before -- a tool that is meant to help me get needed things completed on time, yet it often becomes a source of distress. There are responsibilities that we all have committed to -- for paid or volunteer work, friends and family. There are times when further requests will appear and push their way to the top of the day's list. Managing these things can be challenging. The plan for my 'to do' lists is to put things on the list so I don't have to worry that I'll forget some deadline. It wasn't meant to represent the most important activities in life. For example, yesterday I noted the gorgeous midnight purple tulips at the side of the house -- seven perfect blooms this year. I commented on the fantastic cream coloured magnolias outside town hall -- those huge impossible looking blooms on an otherwise bare tree. Today I sat in the living room with the front screen door open and enjoyed the cool breeze while listening to the birds in the yard -- so peaceful. I fear there are many days when I miss some of the 'small' things that add to the quality of life.

One song came to mind that encompassed the day's musings. Enjoy!

My List -- Toby Keith

Day 2 - 148 -- Searching for Peace and Self-understanding

Well -- today was a usual day -- at least in this new normal. I made time for a nap late in the afternoon rather than fighting it. I did some work online but again, didn't push it too far. The house was stifling from the two days of very hot temperatures. This evening seems to be bringing a break with cooler temps and a slight breeze that helps to bring house temperatures down a bit, too.

Yesterday a few friends reminded me to take care of me and not push too much. I wasn't fully aware that I was forcing or fighting the healing process. I expect a goodly portion of the stress I was struggling with was self-induced. Why do we try to change things that can't be changed instead of accepting them for what they are? There seems to be a reticence to 'go with the flow'.  While reflecting on my reaction to forced changes to my daily routine, I saw that I was focussed on the endpoint and not the journey needed to get there. That is like wishing time away rather than looking at it all and experiencing things fully -- good, bad and in-between. This was an eye-opening discovery. It made me realize that I've been cranky and whiny more than I may need to be -- I don't expect to see this situation through rose coloured glasses, for down times are to be expected. The goal is to accept the feelings but to explore them from other angles to help move past the negative low points and find some peace. Celebrating the small changes along the way may help.

A song came to mind tonight. I hear the lyrics note the difficulties of finding self-acceptance in a crazy world. Enjoy!

(what's so funny 'bout) Peace, Love and Understanding -- Elvis Costello

Day 2 - 147 -- Finding New Rhythms

Another day with full on sun and temperatures in the area of 33C (90 F). Somewhat stifling, but it wasn't too humid to breathe. I went on an outing to the drug store today to pick up some items to help me do regular things with one hand. Got some new hair clips  to replace my usual elastics and some flossers to help with oral care. I would have liked to do a couple other things, but was a bit fatigued with the shopping process.

Feeling a bit short of breath while being physically active was surprising. I've been moving a lot around the house and was in good shape before all this started. It will get better with time. I just need to be more patient -- not my strong suit <smile>.  I have been practising deep breathing to improve lung capacity after surgery and being less mobile for a couple of weeks. Building in a nap time would be good daily -- I feel better on days I have a sleep in the afternoon -- like today. Trying to find that new rhythm for this ever-changing process is my daily challenge.  Things are moving in the right direction, so I just need to pay attention to inner cues a bit more to make the process smoother.

Today's selection, a less known song by this band, speaks to changes and improvements, which seemed to fit my day's thoughts well. It will be a summer of change. Enjoy!

Someday Soon -- Journey

Day 2 - 146 -- A Day of Ups mixed with a few downs

It was an interesting day in terms of weather. It began grey and cloudy, moved along to sprinkles, then poured, then semi-sunshine followed by big wind. A bit of everything there -- very much like my moods today -- they went in all directions. It was better than yesterday, but there is still a long way to travel on this journey. Many friends and family sent small notes that helped me smile and move forward. I tried a new one-handed thing today -- dry mopping the floors. It seemed to work reasonably well. Slow, but it helped gather up the fur from the spring shed and all the little gritty things that stuck to my feet when I walked around. Temps and humidity made slippers and socks a definite 'no go' today.

Again, the day was saved by encouraging words of others. I'm not sure we are ever fully aware of the impact of our words on others -- good and not so good. I also was reminded of past challenges that brought unexpected outcomes. A quote came through my news feed today that helped me to recall this fact -- "All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveller is unaware." (Martin Berber). I guess the goal is to lift one's head and keep an eye on your goals. All other endpoints will present themselves along the road, though some we may never recognize.

I have two selections for today. A dear friend shared the first with me. It made me smile and realize that I need to be aware of surroundings to avoid letting the demons get the best of me <smile>. The second rattled around in my head, noting that each day will have both challenges and triumphs. I enjoy the singers of both songs and hope these speak to you in some way today, too. Enjoy!

Tomorrow's gonna be another day -- The Monkees

Everyday is a winding road -- Sheryl Crow

Day 2 - 145 -- Time moving slowly

Well, working in acute health care facilities led me to expect day three after a major trauma would be the worst. It wasn't a stellar day for me.Greetings, well wishes and help from friends were amazing at taking my mind off the overwhelming weariness and the mounting pain through the day. I got my hair washed, which helped so much in feeling human and 'clean'. I went on a grocery trip with a friend -- afraid to go on my own with taxis at this early stage. That outing added some normalcy to my feeling of isolation. The temperature outside rose dramatically today making the inside temps rise into less comfortable ranges. Wearing a cast, bandage wrap and sling add to the feeling of being too warm -- just one more discomfort to bear.

Not feeling very strong today magnified all the negatives. I know it has just been 3 days since a big surgery and 9 days since the fall, but each day seems like a week. I want to see the purple and blue turn ugly yellow and green -- just so I can 'see' a change. Another 7 days before removal of cast and stitches. I'm not sure I want to see what is under the wrapping -- feeling wussy about that right now. I know there will be bad days and good days along this journey -- even good and bad times in a single day. The darker moments indeed are inky black -- hopefully these will become greyer as things move forward.

So -- not an upbeat song to share today. Rather this one holds many lines that fit my fouler mood -- and a great voice to sing these lyrics. Enjoy!

Physical Pain -- Joan Armatrading

Day 2 - 144 -- Immobility does not prevail

Spent today resting and doing a load of laundry. It is challenging with one arm tied up in a sling. I've been feeling pretty upbeat, but expect tomorrow to be slightly worse -- day 3 after surgery. We'll see.

Not many new thoughts today just more of the 'don't take things for granted' ideas. This is something we as humans do regularly.  It is a challenge that we must all adopt -- take stock of our blessings daily.

The song for today seemed to fit well with my immobile arm stuck in a sling. Enjoy!

Hand in my Pocket -- Alanis Morissette

Day 2 -143 -- Back Home Again

After a restless night, the morning dawned bright and sunny. Physio took me for a walk and offered some OT tips, though no OT was on over the weekend. I'll see what I can get arranged back home. Two wonderful friends who stayed at the hospital for almost 12 hours yesterday, drove back at noon today to spring me. By then I'd managed several mundane daily tasks partly on my own and partly with assistance. It was great to get to my own surroundings again.

Thoughts over the last 24 hours -- loss of dignity is part of the game, so letting that go was easy. Knowing that I needed nursing care overnight was not a huge disappointment; I just knew I couldn't ride in a car for 45 minutes. Surgeons involved were fantastic -- pre- and post-op. The night nurse was an angel -- very kind and helpful. The comradeship of the person in the next bed was helpful as we both struggled through the night. Again, this gives a very different perspective on daily life.

The main chorus of this song came to mind while waiting for my ride home today. Love this version with two singers and acoustic guitars at a great old NYC theatre.Enjoy!

Homeward Bound -- Paul Simon and Willie Nelson

Day 2 - 142 -- Feeling Limp and Hazy

Was way out of commission yesterday. Surgery took a while and recovery was filled with pain killer shots. Sadly, while the meds finally lessened the pain, they created major nausea and vomiting. LSS -- they kept me overnight to keep me hydrated and have vitals checked regularly.  Not a great night but so glad to be in hospital rather than at home.

Only one song came to mind to describe the experience -- one that radio stations chose not to play due to the assumed bad influence on youth, Enjoy!

White Rabbit -- Jefferson Airplane

Day 2 - 141 -- spring blossoms everywhere

Had a good meeting today -- a great project moving forward well is always good to see. The rest of the day was spent prepping for the next medical road trip tomorrow. Many e-mails, phone calls and such.  Just another day here <smile>.

I noticed all the great spring blossoms today, too. The second wave of floral wonders are everywhere. The daffodils, while a bit late are glorious sunny yellow.  And the magnolias are resplendent. Gorgeous pink trees on my block and on campus.  There are creamy white and yellow varieties too, though I wasn't on those parts of campus today. Even the resilient dandelions have begun to spring forth -- not my favourite, but they are great for the bees so I won't wage war on them <smile>.

When thinking of the road trip tomorrow, a great travel song came to mind.  One of my favourite groups with a catchy, upbeat song and music.  Enjoy!

Travelin' Band -- Creedence Clearwater Revival

Day 2 - 140 -- Seeing Things Differently

One thing this waiting to recuperate affords a person is time to reflect.  I have realized how much I took for granted and take for granted  daily.  Health is a life resource (from WHO documents). I'm not saying I did not appreciate this concept, but small things are easy to overlook. Things like being able to braid my hair,  tie my shoes, sleep comfortably, wring out a face cloth -- these are things we do without thinking. When I found myself one handed, I began to truly appreciate strategies for daily living that fall to occupational therapy. I've also noticed how quickly the brain begins to develop work arounds for many processes.

However, there are many things that require outside assistance since they simply require two hands. I've been impressed by the creative minds that have invented devices to assist. I've contemplated getting a fancy jar opener prior to this incident -- this will occur soon as it will be useful for all  the new jars that seem sealed with crazy glue <smile>. A can opener that only requires one hand will also be on the shopping list. I am open to many other items that can ease current challenges, but will also assist in the long run. 

In short, I've seen things in a very different light. I have a better appreciation of physical challenges. Seeing things through a different lens is eye-opening. The selection for today may feel a bit schmaltzy, but the lyrics seemed to fit today's reflection. Enjoy!

On a Clear Day -- Barbra Steisand

Day 2 - 139 -- Reflections on Healthcare Experience

I've noted twice recently that I have a 'horse to the barn' feeling -- I just want to be home and not where I am. This has been particularly true while waiting to see health professionals. Waiting areas are soul-less.  The daily routine for people working with the constant line of damaged people must be wearing. However, one person  can make the industrial sterility of an ER soften a bit. A welcoming word is all it takes to put someone a bit more at ease by knowing that caring persons are taking charge. One person, the first you see, simply opened the door and stood looking at the three of us in the 'blue' chairs. One of the other women turned to me and said that the nurse was waiting for me. How was I to know? The overhead speaker had just called someone's name, so I thought that open door was for them. Once inside the triage office, things did not improve. I was happy that two days before my experience had been much more personal -- including a caring smile.  I wondered how this reception was interpreted by people unfamiliar with the equipment, language and processes of acute care settings. That gate-keeper role could set the tone of fear, confusion, and anger for many people that just need some reassurance.

TVs in waiting rooms in ER can be unpleasant -- too loud, poor channel choice, etc. When most folks are in major distress cartoons seem an odd choice. At the second institution, I moved from blue chairs, to beige chairs and finally to the coveted black chairs -- all 4 of them, so others were standing in the corridor. That area carried a tattered printed sign -- Fast Track Seating. Everyone snorted when they saw that -- perhaps that had been an attempt to make visitors smile -- yet seemed to offer false hope <smile>. Luckily not all caregivers encountered seemed disengaged and were more that helpful, kind and empathetic. I tend to address the absurdities of  situations which helps me smile and shows that I don't plan to be 'that' patient for anyone -- just seems sad when someone's day has made them 'that' ambassador for their dept, institution and the whole health care system.

Among the many new daily challenges has been sleeping -- not due to pain, but basic discomfort of having to sleep on my back and find a way to elevate a splinted arm to reduce swelling. For these past three nights I've slept 3-4 hours only. Today I was up at 4 am so did a number of tasks before finally falling asleep for another 4 hours about 9 am. I feel safer in the familiarity of my own home. Researchers have found that we recuperate faster and better from home than in a care facility. The song for today embodies that feeling of comfort and safety. Enjoy!

In my Room -- Beach Boys

Day 2-138 -- Road Trip

Hard to believe it has just been over 48 hours since my fall. It seems like much longer. Today we drove to visit the Orthopedist -- a 45 minute drive down the highway. It was a glorious day-- bright warm sun, expansive blue sky, and a light breeze that was cooling. My friend noted it was a day for driving a sports car with the top down -- a perfect description of the day.

Not much else of interest to share today -- just one handed tedium <smile>. One fun song seemed appropriate for this day that brought the promise of summer -- finally <smile>. Enjoy!

MGB-GT  -- Peter Tork

Day 2-137 -- Experiencing Social Support

Well -- so far I've made it through 24 hours post injury.I've discovered that many things can be done one-handed albeit less efficiently, yet so many simple things are outright impossible.  I will need to relearn how to dress myself, it seems. How might one tie shoes though? Or braid hair? Today I had 3 friends offer to assist with little things.  Cutting open a package of ham, cutting up a mango, lifting an obstacle out of my way so can  access the deep freeze for supper, providing prepared food, putting on a sling, folding the sheets from the dryer. and so many other activities. Friendship is a wonderful thing,

There is a concept known as social support. It is key to social as well as physical well being. This involves knowing that there are people who will help you when you need assistance. This concept must be reciprocal, though -- knowing that you could help others as their need arises.  I would say that the past day has been filled with social support.

The selection today notes that when independence seems to disappear, we should accept help as needed -- something that can be difficult to do. We should also be mindful of when others might need our help or company. How's your semiphore? <smile> Enjoy!

Help -- The Beatles

Day 2 -136 -- An unexpected turn of events

This post will be short -- typing one handed is slow and way too challenging for my brain -- need some sleep <smile>. Earlier today while heading down to change laundry loads, I slipped and slid down the last 4 steps -- on my left side. The first thing I said was "I broke something."  A neighbour drove me to the ER -- it was a long wait today due to several ambulance arrivals. Once in to see the MD things moved more quickly and I was headed back home wthin an hour..The x-ray showed a clear break of the elbow -- I.'d thought it might be an ulnar break at the elbow -- so was close <smile>. I have a fiberglass splint and will see the orthopedist early in the week, Usual treatment is to let it set in place with a splint or cast -- so until next week that is TBD.

I know I say each new pain is the worst pain ever -- this is particularly nasty. I expect it to be so for a couple weeks  -- though I'd gladly cop to being wrong on this one <grin>.  So-- working weekend -- a long weekend in Canada -- will become one of reading for work and pleasure, looking at a hobby and maybe a movie or two. Poor me <smile>.

The song today says a lot of what has gone through my mind since this afternoon.  It isn't the one that ran through my head, but in this muddled state I can't quite recall that title and singer. However, this song works perfectly. Enjoy!

Pain -- Elton John

Day 2-135 -- Blues Boy Exits

Where to begin this 500th post? I was deep in work at the office and didn't hear the news until I got home this evening. Oddly enough, I was listening to the Blues playlist on the iPod this afternoon. We've lost an amazing musician today -- one who was always on the list of top guitarists of all time. B.B. King died today at age 89 years and has been doing gigs for what seems like a lifetime -- well my lifetime perhaps -- sitting over many of the past years when he could no longer stand through a show. I recall my brother and sister-in-law going to see him in concert many years back and they were thrilled to have the tickets and more thrilled to have spent an evening listening to him.

This man, the son of a Mississippi share-cropper, became a much feted and adored blues musician. His legendary Gibson guitar 'Lucille' provided us with many wonderful moments. These will continue -- a positive aspect of technology.

In honour of this amazing man of music, I chose two items to share here today -- and this wasn't easy to whittle down to only two. The first is somewhat autobiographical highlighting the meaning of music to his life, specifically the role of the guitar. I chose the second song to remind us that while he may be free from the 'spell' of health issues, his music lives on in all of us. I chose an eclectic duo for this video -- almost went with Clapton, but this one shows so well Mr. King's joy while playing. Perhaps these two are singing together again tonight. Finally, given this is the 500th post, the third song was chosen to pay homage to the man and his music rather than celebrate this little blog. Enjoy!

My Lucille -- B.B. King

The Thrill is Gone -- B.B. King ft. Pavarotti

500 Miles -- Peter, Paul and Mary

Day 2-134 -- Food, Music, and Friends

This sunny day brought with it a lovely evening out with a friend. We attended a dinner concert in town. The food was exquisite -- a spinach, arugula and orange salad served with smoked salmon canapes, followed by a wonderful hunter chicken with potato mash, bok choy, carrots and onion, and a dessert trio of mango sorbet on orange crispy meringue, lemon pistachio torte, and pina colada cake.  Totally scrumptious.

The songstress, accompanied by her husband, sang the songs of Edith Piaf. The first song brought tears to my eyes (as did several of the following songs). She was amazing. As a colleague at another table noted during a break, "It's like she's channelling Piaf." I found myself getting lost in the songs -- something that doesn't happen too often in a concert setting. A couple of the songs were new to me, but most were familiar. It was a truly enjoyable event. I even came home with one of her CDs. She is a singer from Wolfville, NS, so is a 'local' talent.

I've chosen two songs from the night to share here. The first is sung by the local woman at a similar event elsewhere. This is the song that she opened with, noting that Piaf had written the song and been told it wasn't good enough so she let it sit on a shelf for a while, eventually choosing to ignore the nay-sayers -- thank goodness! The second song is by the original singer and really represented the cabaret style of singing for which Piaf was known. Enjoy!

La Vie en Rose -- Ariana Nasr

Milord -- Edith Piaf

Day 2 - 133 -- Weather, Work and a Music Legend

The day began about 15C at sunrise but was 4C when I got home for supper 12 hours later. The wind was cold from the north and the air was damp adding to the shiver factor. I had trouble focusing at work today, but I did get a couple very small items done and dealt with some communications about projects underway. Again, not really what was on my list for the day, but things that did need to be done at some point. So -- not a wasted day by any means.

I heard a lyric this morning that noted that the troubadours had invented love. The line caught my attention and had me thinking of it throughtout the day. This line was embedded in a song filled with amazing imagery. The singer-songwriter worries about the loss of poets, but his presence shows us that they are not all lost. His voice has changed with health issues, but it is still wonderful for listening. He is an iconic Canadian cowboy, who at 81 is headed off on a tour of Canada and the US when his new album drops later this month. The song today is from that new collection.Enjoy!

The Wolves No Longer Sing -- Ian Tyson

PS -- A great 3 minute interview segment is also housed on the Canada AM site -- worth a listen. <smile>
http://canadaam.ctvnews.ca/video?playlistId=1.2371631

Day 2-132 -- Future Questions

Among the many small tasks today were three meetings. Two of these were with our work pension provider. The first was to describe the new 'improved' plan and the second was for those thinking of retirement in the next 10 years. Judging by the people in the room, I think many were planning for an earlier departure. I'm not sure either of these meetings answered many of my questions, but I do know they left me with new questions.

So many things to answer. What do I want to do when not working? This will have an impact on how prepared I need to be. How does one decide what the key activities will include? I'm sure a crystal ball might help <smile>. What do I want? What are my dreams? How does one narrow that list? Remember, I'm the one with the undoable 'to do' list <smile>.

The seminars were not deflating, but they did leave me with a sense of urgency. A lyric from a long ago song came to mind. It was a song on an album that I nearly wore out <smile>. I love the upbeat nature of the music and lyrics -- but they took on a whole new meaning for me today.  Enjoy!

Don't Stop -- Fleetwood Mac

Day 2-131 -- Seeing Monday in a Different Light

A colleague asked me how I was this morning and I responded that it was Monday and the sun was shining, so I was doing OK.  Monday can be a difficult day when we focus on the end of the weekend, but it is also the beginning of a new week filled with possibility. I worked through a couple of new tasks today. Even though they took a bit longer than expected, each was  completed in a way that made me feel I'd accomplished something worthwhile. Best of all, neither was on the 'to do' list for what I'd planned to do today <smile>. When complaining about never getting to items on the 'to do' list, another colleague suggested that maybe I should stop making the list. That may be a bit extreme since the list helps me to remember things that need to be done by certain deadlines, but maybe relying less on such a tool could reduce the anxiety that accompanies non-completion of the dreaded list.

So, today felt like a new start rather than a continuation of tedium. It would be great to be able to hold onto that feeling. This brought song lyrics to mind -- lyrics that encompass the concept of starting over. The singer is iconic, though the video is a bit over the top <smile>. Enjoy!

Brand New Day -- Sting

Day 2-130 -- Only One Day for Mothers?

Mother's Day -- a single day devoted to mothers. As a child, we went to church on mother's day wearing carnations. Artificial versions made of cloth-like material (in the days before plastics took over the world <smile>) were available at the 5 and dime and other department stores. These came in three colours, each of which carried a specific meaning. One wore red if one's mother was living, white to honour a deceased mother and pink if you had an adoptive mother. I found it interesting to look around the congregation and learn about someone's personal life from their lapel flower.

We do seem to have days, weeks or months devoted to things we should be mindful of every day. Mothers seem to have this one day, but do people think about this family member throughout the year? Many do and gifts and thank yous should not be confined to one day. We didn't make breakfast in bed for mom very often -- it wasn't common in our home. Dad generally cooked Sunday breakfast and dinner throughout the year, so Mother's day was no different. We did purchase gift items or flowers for her on this day. I recall shopping with Dad for lamps one year and jewellery another year. Since I moved away, a phone call has become part of the day -- that and a card and gift in the mail. <smile> I also think of my grandmothers who were integral parts of my life until early adulthood and women who taught me a lot. I also think of my other mothers one passed and one who turned 99 this year. They, too, provided me with much wisdom and understanding. So, if I were to wear carnations today, I feel I'd have to wear a bouquet of red, pink and white.

The selection today was written for mothers and the lyrics have a superficial and a deeper meaning. I hear a call for music of her day and her wisdom. Enjoy!

Your Mother Should Know -- The Beatles

Day 2-129 -- A cloudy introspective day

It has been a cloudy introspective Saturday <smile>, working my way through some interactions and wondering where the  truth lies. A wise friend has said that everyone has a story and that the stories may not match up. Now that I can understand -- being a postmodernist I understand that truth is pluralistic. I've come to wonder though if there are multiple truths within each of us, too. Do we hide truth from ourselves? Granted there are things that are not pleasant to look at inside ourselves -- things we may not even fully understand. Trying to prettify them will not help us to move forward past these events, though.

I try to give others the benefit of a doubt or justify their behaviours or words. It isn't always easy if this occurs often with someone. Is there a point where my justifications are simply deluding me? Do they cover up the truth that I don't want to see or believe? A definite possibility. Yet, I feel that I've moved outside my comfort zone if I am less than charitable with others -- even if that is mirroring what I may experience from them. Would the world be better if there were more truthfulness and honesty between and within people? I'm not sure. It may be that some hiding from truth is a necessary survival technique. Hmmmm -- more pondering needed here, it seems.

The selection I've chosen to share is by a singer-songwriter who has been featured here many times -- even as the first post ever made in this blog. He plays the instrument with which I am most familiar and his lyrics have deep poetic meaning. This song seems to say some of the things I've been pondering while doing weekend chores today. Enjoy!

Honesty -- Billy Joel

Day 2-128 -- Visits from Home

I took the whole day off work to visit with friends. What a perfect way to spend a Friday.  A friend from Saskatchewan is visiting relatives near here and she drove up to go for lunch and spend the afternoon visiting -- great fun and so relaxing. Interesting that her career took her west and mine took me east -- go figure <smile>.  I met another friend for a light supper and wonderful conversation. She moved back this way about a year ago, yet we met in grad school in Saskatchewan.

It is always fun to spend time with friends and even better to connect with people from home. This country is so large that home can be very far away. Such visits bring it closer. Being able to pick up a conversation as if we'd not been apart for a while is such a gift. Being able to discuss anything without fear of judgement is amazing. Everyone should have access to such fantastic friendships.

Yesterday I had a conversation about the artist who performs today's selection. The song is about my home province -- where I met both friends I visited with today. While the artist is from Alberta, near the end the lyrics explain his reason for writing this one. It is fun as many of his songs are. The video chosen is part of a larger 8-minute interview on Q - TV. Enjoy!

Long Gone to Saskatchewan -- Corb Lund and the Hurtin' Albertans

Day 2- 127 -- Move it on out

Today has been fairly uneventful. That is not a bad thing. Having a calm day every now and then can be revitalizing. Overall, the sunny day was delightful but required extra layers due to the cool wind. I had time to clear out some e-files to make room for the new materials. Hopefully this will stop the daily messages about the inbox being close to the limit for size. It can be challenging when there are many student e-mails along with messages from task groups that should be archived --not forever but for the requisite amount of time based on the ethics guidelines. Once deadlines pass, many messages can be eliminated. Once my eyes were so dry and scratchy from staring at the screen for too long, it was time to head out for a physio appointment -- trying to get ahead of a problem this time.

Clearing through files can be challenging. Many items are easy to delete or keep, while others take more thought. The latter can be emotionally draining if a favourite project is involved. Cleaning through the multitude of files can be time-consuming -- often leading to only part of the job being completed each year resulting in unmanageable numbers of documents in short order. I try to get through the active files each year along with at least one of the drawers of the upright file. The paper file attack has yet to occur, but will need to be completed to make more room, just as with the e-files. The need to be brutal with the sorting can be a challenge. Sometimes it seems easier to just walk away <smile>, however the plan is to begin the process not complete a full overhaul -- small steps toward the goal <smile>. 

One song for sending things along their way came to mind. While the lyrics don't relate directly to the file sorting process, the thought is the same -- moving things to which we may have an emotional attachment out of our lives. Challenging, but I'm told this is rewarding, too. Enjoy!

Hit the Road Jack -- The Stampeders

Day - 2-126 -- Hopeful Signs of Winter Departing

A sunny day with strong northerly winds made this pleasant but cool -- and called for a comb to be on hand. Work involved a meeting and one that was rescheduled for next week, as well as getting through a bit of overdue paperwork. For staff appreciation day today, we attended a barbecue (held inside thankfully) where we had chicken breast on a bun and ice cream treats. That was a fun break in the middle of the day. After work, I did some errands on Main Street and enjoyed walking in the late day sunshine, even if it was cool. The snow on the front lawn seems gone this evening -- that 10 foot ice mountain has melted away. There are still two piles of snow right by the front porch, but they are shrinking slowly since they are in full shade.

It is interesting that summer activities in spring can bring happy feelings. It was great to see all the smiling and laughing faces at the noon bbq -- a simple event that raised spirits. Maybe it gives us some hope that the dark of winter is behind us and we will soon enjoy sunny summer days. Maybe it was part of having this fun event in the midst of a work day. Or maybe some combination of these two. Whatever the reason I felt a bit lighter for the rest of the day.

I've selected an instrumental with a title that fits the day's theme. The musician is an icon and a true master. Every time I hear him play, it reminds me of my dad as he truly loved this musician's style. Enjoy!

Struttin' with some Barbecue -- Louis Armstrong

Day 2-125 -- Strong Woman of History

The Google doodle today is for the 151st birthday of Nellie Bly. It celebrates the need for women to stand up for themselves and for other women. This woman was an investigative journalist by trade, shedding light on many inequities of the time. She circumnavigated the globe for a story, doing so in 80 days. Her courage and perseverance are a model for all.

In grade 8 we were given a biography of Nellie Bly to read. It surely contained only the sanitized version of her trip into the women's asylum in New York. I admit that I don't recall a lot of the story, but a group of students were assigned to do a group book report in some creative way. Our group chose to do a play based heavily on the book. I agreed to be director. We met at several homes to complete the work of writing and rehearsing. On the day of the play, we prepped in the cloak room off the classroom, with actors heading into the classroom for the 20-odd scenes we'd devised. It did not go off without a hitch, but it went fairly well. Looking back, I know I wasn't fully aware of the pioneering spirit of this woman and how she was one of those who led the way to greater freedoms for women. She met with suffragettes so would have been part of the social unrest involved in women receiving the right to vote. I'd like to find that book again and read through it now. I'm sure it would be eye-opening on many levels.

Today's selection presents aspects of being female and being strong and empowered -- and it does it with a fair degree of sarcasm <smile>. Enjoy!

Just a Girl -- No Doubt (w/ Gwen Stefani)

Day 2 - 124 -- Purples, Blues and Creams

This was the warmest day we've had since Christmas Day 2014. It rose to almost 20C. There is still snow in the yard, but with another day or two like this -- warm with full sun -- I expect most of it will be gone. <smile> On the weekend, there were 4 snowdrops peeking through the front lawn. Yesterday there were a few periwinkles and budding crocuses. Today, four crocuses opened -- two creamy white and two purple with white stripes. There are more popping up to bloom soon. I stopped at a friend's home after work and the front yard there is ablaze with yellow and dark purple blooms. The house up the street from me also has dark blue lining the walkway today. Gorgeous!

I so look forward to seeing these signs of spring. They are naturalized through the front lawn and promise that things will get greener. They were up and waiting under the snow pack that melted off that part of the yard two days ago. Blues and creams would be my choice for landscaping, so I am very pleased to live in this yard where someone before me felt the same. In my yard the next to show will be tulips --still a few weeks away, though they are about 6 inches tall today. These are 'black' tulips -- a beautiful deep, deep purple. This is the beginning. Can the magnolias and rhodies be far behind? <smile>

The relaxed feeling these flowers bring calls for a relaxing song. The thought of these blooms and those yet to come brought to mind a line from a sixties song. Enjoy!

San Francisco -- Scott McKenzie

Day 2 - 123 -- Sunshine and Excitement

Today was bright and sunny -- a perfect day for convocation. It was even warm enough to walk outside without gloves <smile>. I helped organize our group in order for the lineup -- 4 across. It is somewhat like herding cats -- that organized chaos. It all worked out perfectly. So many happy, excited people, it was wonderful to be part of that. We hold a tea for students and families right after the ceremonies. Meeting parents, siblings, partners and friends is delightful. It can be bittersweet as the students are all going their separate ways at that point.

Endings and beginnings. Exciting plans for the summer are shared with longer term plans for grad school, internship or further training in the fall. While one chapter ends, the new one is already being written. There is much excitement, many photos being taken, always big smiles; yet in the corner of the eye is a slight hint of sadness -- sad to see this part of life's journey ending -- but its just a small, almost hidden feature. I've done this several times through life and have experienced the wistfulness of an ending. Leaving somewhere that has become a sort of home -- school or work -- brings mixed feelings. Perhaps it is somewhat like that proverbial emotional roller-coaster. Sadness, excitement, fear, joy -- it truly is a workout.

The song title that came to mind today covers the endings and beginnings, while the lyrics present many contradictory ideas. It was written by a prolific duo, members of the fabulous foursome who perform the song. Enjoy!

Hello, Goodbye -- The Beatles

Day 2 - 122 -- Under the Effects of Inertia

The day has been less productive than planned. Inertia rules. If you are moving it keeps you moving and if you are not moving it sustains that lack of action. Needless to say, the latter is prominent at my place today. A bit of laundry was completed but many of the reading and calculating projects seemed not to take off well.

In the evening, the first major event of the convocation weekend occurred. It has gone by many names over the years, but has settled on a farewell ceremony rather than the earlier mass or liturgy, which limited attendance of some. It is a lovely event that combines tradition with current norms. It can be delightful when weather cooperates as the procession is outdoors with everyone in academic regalia (not the warmest nor does it stand up well in a wind <smile>).  Beginning in early evening, the sun has set by the end of the ceremony. Students traditionally form an honour guard outside the chapel with lit candles through which the faculty walk as they exit the event. Very beautiful to see tonight along with the nearly full moon and stars.

I'm not sure why some days it seems so difficult to get to the 'to do' list even when it involves reading reports or calculating accounts <smile>.  The overwhelming urge to do nothing is an odd feeling. I tried to make a grocery list and couldn't concentrate long enough -- I felt bored <sigh>. It brought to mind a song we sang when I was a child -- one that I rediscovered on a Harry Connick, Jr. CD years later. I'll share another somewhat recent version here tonight. Enjoy!

Lazy Bones -- Leon Redbone

Day 2-121 -- Elusive Writing Muse

This has been a good week for writing -- well writing that was completed a year ago or more. Messages received this week noted that a food issues encyclopaedia (with 2 entries from me) was finally published. Another entry into an edited book was approved and will be printed in English and Italian. Cool. <smile> One of these projects was submitted almost 2 years ago and the other was a year ago. Another proposed chapter in a book submitted by a graduated student a year ago was chosen for inclusion in a volume about food in everyday life. This was work from her Honours thesis. These projects always take longer to get to print than planned. Editing a book project must be like herding cats. I've worked on content gathering for a national newsletter and deadlines seem to be ballpark dates for many people <smile>. Gentle reminders or finding replacement writers takes time. I admire the work of these editors. It interests me, but seems more like a retirement project than something that could be shepherded along with a full time academic position.

Other writing projects from various research projects sit partially completed in my office.  They are in the back of my mind, but I find the focused 2 to 4 days I need to write a project aren't available during the teaching term. Fitting all of these projects into the four months between terms is challenging, too. Conference presentations occur here and this is the only time to fit in any vacation time. Needless to say, writing becomes a vacation activity -- so not really a vaca. However, finding somewhere interesting to sit and write could be a vacation of sorts. I will need to work on that <smile>  or find an ideal muse.

A song about writing was a challenge. One came to mind about a famous author. I hesitated to use this as I don't see my writing anywhere close to the caliber of this man. No. Where. Near. The lyrics note the trials of the writing process, though, so I will share that selection today. Enjoy!

Hemingway's Whiskey -- Kenny Chesney