Day 8 - 294 -- Frustration as Euphemism

I've pondered feelings of frustration this week. I hesitate to call it anger and moreso to use the term rage. That has made me think. Why do I feel the need to use a euphemism here? Why is it that women feel anger with similar frequency and intensity as men, yet we express it so much differently? We've learned from an early age that anger isn't feminine. How do we express it then? Shouting, screaming or fighting don't happen nearly as often as they do with men. We have been socialized to address things differently. So, women tend to use passive-aggressive techniques like sulking, speaking malicious gossip, and acting like those mean girls in high school. Paradoxical non-verbal cues are used to soften some of the words spoken -- like smiling while saying something that is likely to hurt the recipient. And, while women tend to be less aggressive than men, they also talk about anger more. This oral processing helps to work through the anger in a more productive manner. 

Many emotions can lead to anger -- betrayal, fear, frustration, sadness, worry, and loss to name just a few. Needless to say living in the times we do results in more than enough of these emotions. It is surprising that that not everyone is seething with rage -- though many are. Some people show it clearly on their faces and body posture. Others have learned to swallow it all and present a disguise to the rest of the world. Unfairness abounds and this creates that frustration in me often. Sometimes I feel cheated but most often I see how others have been treated unfairly. There are days when it just bubbles up to a full rolling boil (to use a cooking metaphor <smile>). We can learn from such episodes, but we do have to find a way to release those feelings without hurting ourselves or others. I know people who pour this into making music or art. I write here as a way of processing myriad feelings and experiences and when that doesn't do it, I go for a walk. I hope you find something that works well for you. 

I share a song with some lyrics that spoke to me when pondering this all. Keep safe. Enjoy! 

I Have Seen the Rain -- Pink & Jim Moore