It has been a busy day. I packed a few smaller piles of stuff before going to measure for curtain rods at the new place. There are lots of large windows that will provide great light from the east and the west. I then made arrangements to transfer cable and electric utilities to the new place. I am into the final month before being fully moved to the new dwelling.
I'm tired and having difficulty focusing. It has been like this for a long time and will continue. Getting to the 'end' of the process will only mean getting to the beginning of the next phase -- unpacking. Yet another hateful passtime. <sigh> If I recall correctly, it does go more quickly than packing. Finding places for all the things in a new layout can be challenging. This one doesn't have a linen closet, so where should the sheets and towels be housed? It likely won't make much sense until I get into the place and spend a few weeks living there and getting used to the space. New routines and pathways will emerge with time, and time will help me move things around to fit daily activities. It comes down to facing change head-on -- not something I do well. Change shows up regularly often with its good friend anxiety -- something I'm familiar with, but don't always manage well. Pausing to breathe and acknowledge feelings can help a bit. I will continue to find ways of handling the silliness that comes with major change.
Late in the afternoon, I spend time in the yard -- looking at the flowers and growth of the plants. I weeded a bit and just took time to breathe and enjoy the yard that I will miss so much. The plants reminded me of hope and resilience, which made a few lines of lyric stick in my head. I share a song about change but with a positive way of dealing with it all.
Courage to Change -- Sia
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